Asserting Yourself with "No"
An Article by Colleen Clarke, Career Specialist and Corporate
Trainer
When there is unrest in the workplace due to market downturns,
rising gas prices, utility increases and a slumping real estate
market, security starts to look like a foreign word in many employees
minds. It is at times like these, that manager’s start asking
for more from their team. We also have a tendency to put more pressure
on ourselves to produce, in the hopes of keeping our job should
lay offs occur. To keep your job, your self-respect, your sanity
and some kind of work/life balance, try these nine ways of saying
NO without saying “NO”. (Many of these apply to coworkers)
- “I would if I could”, “however” - don’t
use “but”, use “and” or “however.”
- “Which of these other tasks should I put aside?”
Give the responsibility of all that has been assigned to you to
the assignee. If the new request comes from someone other than the
person to whom you are working with at the moment, ask the new requester
to ask the other task master to give you permission to switch tasks.
- “After looking at my calendar, I can’t get to it
until next week. Would that be ok?” This is a great stalling
technique.
- “Can I get back to you on that?” It shows you are
thinking about it.
- “I’d be glad to; however, there are others who know
this work better than me.” Be careful not to suggest any one
person in particular.
- “After realizing the scope of the project, I’m going
to have to say no.”
- “I would feel awkward doing this for you”. This is
a common response to personal requests made by bosses of employees;
like buying presents or clothing for them.
- “I’m sorry, I just can’t do it.”
- “I’ll do it, if you’ll do a task for me.”
Of course, you have to use common sense in determining who you can
legitimately say no to and whom you cannot. Step out of your comfort
zone and get out there and practice them. Use a pleasant tone of
voice and look the person in the eye. Smiling will help too.
Colleen Clarke, Career Specialist and Corporate Trainer, www.colleenclarke.com
Author of Networking How to Build Relationships That Count and How
to Get a Job and Keep It
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