We Attract What We Focus On,
An Article by Colleen Clarke, Career Specialist & Corporate Trainer
I like to think that generally, people are pretty optimistic. You
set goals, you take steps to improve or increase or decrease or
manifest what you want in your life; maybe you even do visualization
exercises. Negative or positive, wanted or not, what we focus on
expands and brings negative or positive experiences to us through
our thoughts and words. Just as a magnet attracts metal, our words
attract the things we talk about, says Janice Calnan, author of
SHIFT: Secrets of Positive Change for Organizations and Their Leaders.
It all starts at the age of two when you started saying No to everything
your parents wanted you to do. They took away your control and you
didn’t like it.
The same situation is taking place today, as adults. We spend
too much time dealing with the problem instead of the solution and
we spend too much time talking about what we don’t have rather
than talking about and appreciating what we have.
To be able to manifest or attract what we want into our lives,
a new job, a raise, a new career, a life partner or good health,
we have to focus on what we want, not what we don’t have.
It is all about the LACK and ABUNDANCE theory.
To get, you have to be thankful for what you have. When trying
to attract more money into your life you have to feel like you already
have the money. It is important to never talk about being broke
or not being able to buy things, but to focus and talk about what
you have and can buy or will buy.
I see it, and even lived it, many times while working with people
who are unemployed. The mantra is often, I can’t find a job.
There are no jobs. No one will hire me. I’m too old, too tall,
too bald, no experience, whatever. A simple example I experience
all the time: when I am driving to a place where I need to park,
I just assume I will find a spot. My thought is I wonder what spot
I will find today. If instead I thought and believed, “It’s
impossible to get a parking spot on the street in downtown Toronto”,
you are right, that dominant thought becomes your reality. You made
it come true. I find parking spots over 80% of the time within block
of where I want to go. Think about it.
Thinking and verbalizing positive thoughts, ones of abundance
not lack, brings your goals into sight. So focus on the outcome
and what that is going to look like, not the problem or challenge.
When I get a job I am going to do; when I lose weight I am going
to feel terrific about myself.
One of the first lessons of good communication that I learned when
I was revving up to be a communications trainer was not to use the
word DONT. I love this advice and now am obsessively cognizant when
people say, don’t forget to phone me. Don’t forget to
take an umbrella. What is wrong with that you ask? Look at it this
way. The sub conscious mind does not register negatives, so your
conscious mind hears “forget to phone”. And forget your
umbrella. You have issued a forget order, when what you meant is
exactly the opposite.
Using DONT is condescending and controlling and indicates that the
person is so forgetful that they must be reminded. Instead, tell
people what you want them to do, NOT what you don’t want from
them Remember to call me. Remember to take your umbrella (the unspoken
message being, because I love you. “Don’t forget”
suggests you idiot)
It takes a lot of self exploration, listening to yourself, and practice,
to attract what you want. Start by saying Remember.
Look out the front windshield, not the rear view mirror.
Colleen Clarke, Career Specialist & Corporate Trainer, www.colleenclarke.com,
416-686-3079, Author of Networking How To Build Relationships That
Count and How To Get a Job and Keep It
More Career Articles
|
